What A Stud!
by TheForgottenUzumaki
Summary: Just a short thing making fun of those Sasuke fics. You know the ones. (Note: I don't hate Sasuke, in fact I really like SasuSaku. Those fics are just getting hilarious. T just in case?)


Sasuke smirked to himself as he lowered his glass. Naruto was washing dishes in the kitchen, leaving Sasuke and Hinata alone at the dining table. He watched the Uzumaki woman in silence for a moment before leaning forward a little. He had always thought she was beautiful, and couldn't really see why she ended up with **such** a beta like Naruto. Sasuke was married to Sakura, of course, and the two had a daughter. But he couldn't ignore the **obvious** spark between him and the pale eyed beauty that was smiling gently at him. He knew Sakura would understand, and so with a small nod to himself Sasuke began his plan.

"Hinata, if you don't mind me asking, why did you marry Naruto?"

Hinata looked surprised by the question and tilted her head a little. "Huh? I love Naruto-kun. I've always loved him. His kindness, his strength to never give up, the way he tries to see the good in everyone..." she explained, trailing off as Sasuke placed his hand on her thigh. "Huh...? Sasuke...?"

"Shh. Wouldn't you rather be with an alpha male like me? Naruto is **such** a beta bitch-"

At this point, Hinata began to laugh hard, tears forming in her eyes as she leaned back in her chair. "Oh, my god, Sasuke. You're such a jokester!" she finally managed to get out between laughs as she wiped the tears away. When Sasuke gave her a confused look, Hinata blinked several times. "You're...You're serious?"

"Of course I am, Hinata. I'm the last Uchiha. You're the Hyüga heiress. Our families are rich. We'd make a perfect match," the Uchiha pointed out with a smirk.

"Oh, Sasuke..." Hinata began. "You...are adorable."

Sasuke's confusion only grew now. How could Hinata possibly say no?! He was cool, he was **such** a **badass** , a sex god! No woman could resist his **charm**!

"You aren't even being ironic when you use those terms, are you?" the amused Hyüga-Uzumaki questioned. "'Alpha' and 'Beta'. Are you a child?"

"I-"

"Not only that, but you have a WIFE, Sasuke. Said wife being a very good friend?"

"She-"

"Let's not forget your daughter. You know, the one Naruto practically helped Sakura raise? Hold on. Naruto-kun! Could you come here?" Hinata called out.

Naruto soon entered the room, a dish towel over his right shoulder. "Hey, Hinata-chan. What's up?"

"Sasuke just tried seducing me. He called you a 'beta bitch'," the happy wife explained.

Raising a brow, Naruto only chuckled. "Oh, buddy. I know you're in a failing marriage, but-"

Sasuke stood at that. He could show Hinata what a badass stud he was! He swung at Naruto, but the blonde just stepped out of the way of the clumsy punch and laughed. "Oh man, come on Sasuke, you aren't a fighting expert. Calm down while I give Sakura-chan a call." Naruto took out his phone and dialed his friend, chuckling.

"No need for that. Sakura's fine with this sort of thing. Trust me," Sasuke muttered.

"Hey, Naruto! What's up?" Sakura soon said on speaker.

"Oh, Sasuke tried to seduce Hinata-chan. Said 'alpha' and 'beta', tried starting a fight. Could you drop by after your shift at the hospital to get Sasuke?"

Sakura was dead silent for several seconds. Sasuke smirked at Naruto. His wife would side with him, **of course**!

"Could you just send him away? I don't really want him home right now. Sarada shouldn't have to see her father thrown out," Sakura said. She then couldn't help but giggle. "Really, Sasuke? Cheating? Come on, this isn't a porno. Thanks for giving me a call, guys!" With that, Sakura hung up. When Naruto casually motioned for Sasuke to leave, the Uchiha glared and slowly walked away, slamming the door on his way out.

"Really. What was his thinking? That his life was some sort of cuck story where he'd take me from you?" Hinata asked between giggles.

"Sorry, dear. I only invited him because Sakura asked me to," Naruto replied with a shrug as he sat by his wife, the two laughing.


End file.
